Different kinds of ninja

I am a ninja. But not just any ninja, I am a ninja LOVER! I sneak in, (I am very sneaky) so you don’t even know I’m there. I do my thang, and then I leave. (you won’t even know I’m there) Wait... no... that sounded dirty... What I meant was...um...

I am a ninja. But not just any ninja. I am a ninja GO-KART! I have four wheels and a shuriken! I zoom around like a go-kart, and... um... ninja around like a ninja! I run on double A batteries and never need a refill on gas! Because I am a Go-Kart. (Now that doesn’t make ANY sense... lemme start over)

I am a ninja. But not just any ninja. I am a ninja LIGHTBULB! I am very sneaky... and bright. I am bright. (it makes it hard to sneak, so I must be a very good sneaker) I light the way for people in a dark alley and beat up muggers! I have lightbulb-senses, they tingle and tell me when I am in danger! There is no copywright infrigment!

I am a ninja. But not just any ninja. I am a ninja MATRIX! I am the spoon that there isn’t! (There isn’t because you can’t see me. I am too sneaky.) I am the one... the one ninja. I stop bullets. Except the ones that hit me... But I guess I stop those with my flesh... Nevermind...

I am a ninja. But not just any ninja. I am a ninja SAMURAI! I favour stealth an finesse as well as briute strength and power! I chop people up with my big sword and also stab them with my little stabbety dagger thingy! (I named it myself) I am proud of my children, for they are good, strong ninjas and samurais at the same time. They can multi task! They are the mailman’s children? You cheating *blank!*

I am a ninja. But not just any ninja. I am a ninja FINGER! I poke my opponents into subbmission with my super sneaky ninja poking powers! (SSNPP for short) I wear a black glove! Because I am a ninja! And ninjas wear black! Fingers wear gloves! So I wear black gloves! OWCH! Ingrown fingernail!

I am a ninja. But not just any ninja. I am a ninja PIRATE! I am sneaky and say ARRR! (like a pirate, AND a ninja!) I have a hook for a hand! Just like in that story about the flying kid! I sneak through neverland! Because I am a pirate as well as a ninja! Argh! Crocodile thingy! eek!

I am a ninja. But not just any ninja. I am a ninja BOTTLE! I hold things very well! But also sneakily! SO sometimes people think I don’t hold things well! (Because the sneakiness hides them!) I also save people on deserted islands by sending out messages! Sneaky messages! In code! (Sneaky code!) My code is so sneaky, no one but me can read it! It’s that sneaky! Almost too sneaky!

I am a ninja. But not just any ninja. I am a ninja APPLE! I have a core! But no worms. I am too sneaky for the worms. The worms cannot find me. (Because I am so sneaky) Hooray for sneakiness! Um... er.... Sneaky!... and... uh... Hooray! Um... Apple! Ninja apple! ...

I am not a ninja. I am a SUPER-MECHA-DESTROYER-ROBO-NINJA!
I am not sneaky. I am  SUPER-MECHA-DESTROYER-ROBO-SNEAKY!
This isn’t the end. It’s the SUPER-MECHA-DESTROYER-ROBO-END!